Monday, March 18, 2013

七成市民認為香港人生活痛苦

一項調查發現,七成市民認為香港人生活痛苦。樹仁大學經濟與民生研究計劃,上月以電話訪問了1500人,有七成市民認為現在生活痛苦,當中五成半認為頗痛 苦,一成六非常痛苦,整體痛苦指數,以4分代表非常痛苦計,有2.85分。按照家庭月入劃分,月入1萬至2萬元的家庭最感生活痛苦,痛苦指數約2.9分。 研究員分析表示,他們月入低於全港家庭收入中位數,但卻高於一般貧窮線定義,享受到政府福利相當有限,但同時面對嚴峻生活壓力。另外,以年齡劃分,55至 64歲群組的痛苦指數最高。分析指出,這與他們憂慮日後退休生活是否得到保障有關。而在六大民生問題中,令港人活得最痛苦的是住屋問題,其次是物價。

Sunday, March 3, 2013

陳振聰的水禮見證

以下是陳振聰的水禮見證。For the info of my American friends, 陳振聰2007年4月,聲稱自己是香港華懋集團已故主席龔如心千億遺產的唯一受益人而引發令人感可恥的爭產案。
……………………………………
各位弟兄姊妹平安,大家好,這篇是我四月份洗禮,得到救恩的見証。
今天能夠站在這裡,感覺很奇妙,多謝送第一本聖經給我的,譚文華弟兄,和2位牧師不離不棄的帶領,是阡陌社區浸信會的,林以諾牧師,已經榮休的堅道浸信會 的劉少康牧師,引領我決志信主的,潘文信牧師。再加上弟兄姊妹的包容,我才能蒙神的恩典,跟大家分享我被聖靈感動的見證。
我很喜歡以下這節經文:
「若有人在基督裡,他就是新造的人,舊事已過,都變成新的了。」(歌林多後書5:17)
我的背景相信不需再多說,以前的我,嚴格來說是沒有宗教信仰,但相信風水能為人帶來好運,今天,受神的感召,有新的看法。認識耶穌基督之後,讓我明白,人是不能預知明天的,一切透過預知而得到的幸運、金錢財富,都是魔鬼的引誘。
風水不靈驗,你的損失只是幾千蚊幾萬蚊;但如果風水靈驗的話,則更要小心,因為魔鬼的動機是,製造靈驗的效果,引誘人們歸向撒旦。
我承認,以前做過一些神所不喜悅的事情。大家見到我,都會唾罵我、厭棄我,當時我的內心真的很難受,被人當作過街老鼠一樣。做了幾十年人,情緒從未如此低落。
有一日,成為我往後人生的轉捩點。
去年3月底,在我家工作了逾十年的司機 Henry (譚文華弟兄)突然向我請辭,原因是找到一份替基督徒家庭辦事的工作,星期日可放假返教會。Henry 臨走時更將跟隨他多年的聖經送了給我。當我伸手接過這本聖經時,奇蹟便出現了。
我接住本聖經時,雙手感覺像麻痺一樣,像是中了風,全身不能動彈,雖然這個感覺只維持了短暫時間,卻令我感到十分奇妙。
過了一會定過神後,翻開聖經看看。一翻便是出埃及記,看到摩西帶領以色列人出埃及。看完聖經後,我再問 Henry,我想單獨見見牧師?(為何要單獨?因為怕被其他人看到傳出是非,影響其他人)
Henry 於是向他所屬教會堅道浸信會主任劉少康牧師道出了要求,劉牧師更找來他的朋友阡陌社區浸信會林以諾牧師一同向我講解基督的救恩。
之後,我便開始參加堅道浸信會主辦 2012年度 Alpha course (啟發課程) 。
回想起,在我18歲的時候,也曾短暫地返過教會,這幾十年一直也沒有想過返教會聽崇拜。第一次返Alpha course 時,有接近200人參加,我坐在5號枱,當日由堅道浸信會的會佐講道,主題是「快樂」。他說,快樂的定義是甚麼?就是「舒心、安心、放心」。講道開始不夠 3分鐘,我的耳及面便開始紅起來。
他說:2010年,香港人的快樂指數上升是因為3件事。(一)是政府派錢$6,000,(二) 是威廉王子結婚. …… 第三件事是甚麼呢?
說到這裡,我的背、額頭開始滲汗,心跳得很快,更想找個地方躲起來,心想可能下次不來了。
大家估到第三件事是甚麼呢?… 陳振聰終極敗訴。
我在留意有沒有人在拍掌、在訕笑呢?誰知,全場毫無異樣,原來都不是一回事,我便鬆了一口氣,內心此時異常平靜,認為這裡就是我的家了。
自此之後,我每天靈修、讀經、祈禱,與神談話。
有個經歷好想同大家分享:
在參加 Alpha Course 時認識了一位姊妹孫太,孫太介紹了她的好朋友 Kitty Chan (陳婉華律師)給我認識。KITTY 邀請我參加了蘇比牧師 (Pastor Julius Suubi) 的佈道會。蘇比牧師來自非洲,在聽他講道時,感覺像是飲醉酒,個身好輕似是飄浮在半空中。
後來我感覺到 Kitty Chan 輕輕拍了我一下,霎時間我才發現自己在坐位前,跪了在地上,Kitty 當時告訴我,原來當時我已跪了一小時,那時候我才感覺到膝部的痛楚。佈道會後,有機會與蘇比牧師為我祈禱,他對我說,聖靈告訴他,上帝要除了我的舊名字, 換上新的名字:Peter。而家教會的朋友都改口稱我為 Peter了。
我有個新名字,舊事已過,一切都變成新的了。
上了3個月的 Alpha Course後,認識了很多弟兄姊妹,更認識了不少聖經金句,有一句更是常伴我左右。
當我感到困惑時:「你的話是我腳前的燈,是我路上的光。我甚是受苦,耶和華啊,求你照你的話將我救活!」(詩篇119:105、107)
我的生命路,如今已經和上帝接軌。我的過去,是神不喜悅的生活方式,於是就無法接觸上帝,神要用一條苦難的路,安排我走過。在途中,我與神相遇,並得到救恩。
今天,我的生命真的改變了,因為得到快樂的時間多了。3年前,2010年2月2日,法庭的判決,我開始走上一條崎嶇的路。就是這樣痛的日子,又怎能忘記呢?但我真的忘記了,今日,執筆至此,我竟要打電話問朋友,才能準確記起這一日。
舊事已過,一切都變成新的了。
環境縱然沒變,但心變了,生命變了,對一切生活和生命的要求都徹徹底底地變了。
我的人生,大起大落,窮過、有錢過;捱過、亦都歎過,但回頭看其實什麼都不是,只不過是過眼即去,幻夢數碼的人生。但上帝就用這工具,改變了我的真正生 命,給予我永恆盼望。也用這工具,改變了大家,要大家反思人生,擁抱祂的恩典。而且,也正因為如此,我和各位弟兄姊妹,本來各人自有完全不一樣的生命軌道 上,靠著神,讓我能藉此機會分享因主而改變。
我相信,上帝對我們每一個都是有祂的旨意,我自己只是靜靜地祈禱,等候祂頒下另一道聖旨,接受任務,開展新的明天。
要跑盡人生的路並不容易,那需要很大的信心與勇氣,因人生充滿了各種的愁苦、絕境,使人的心靈常跌在失望、憂傷之中。因此很多人就用盡各種方法,去追求快樂,使人生能減少愁苦。
一般來說,人會利用金錢以控制一切可能痛苦的日子,所以他們把人生的希望寄託在財富上。可是財富是虛幻的,不能永存;有人指望別人,利用人的幫助減輕或逃 避困苦,可惜人卻是善變的,沒有永遠的朋友;有人利用權勢為自己締造順利的環境,可是權勢並非絕對的,每一天總會有失勢的可能;更有人只信任自己,把一切 希望放在自己身上,滿以為可以控制一切,可惜人生苦短,他卻無法控制自己的壽歲。
真正的人生出路仍是在於神,因祂是創造者,也是掌管萬有者,我們的生命都在祂手中。祂愛我們,渴望我們的生命能有一日回復祂本性上一切的完美,祂置我們於 困難中,乃熬煉我們的生命,至使我們的生命更純全。因此,我們可以默然面對一切的苦難,也可以說:神啊,我的祉望在乎你!
由今天起,我就是新造的人。
如果你今天問我:你害怕坐監嗎?/ 你害怕你餘下的人生道路難行嗎?我會好堅定地回答:「我‧不‧怕」,因為神與我同在,從我決志的那一刻,我已將我的所有交託給神,祂會帶領我、引領我走前面的道路。
最後,我想分享一首很喜愛的詩歌給大家。
這是我在 (2日的經歷神營會)認識的 Raymond Tam 譚弟兄送給我分享l的詩歌,對我很有感動。
(愛與被愛)
哀傷裡尋到擁抱,
低谷裡能夠升高;
艱苦裡能同心禱告,
在跌倒時來鼓舞!
為我擦亮眼,
曉得愛與被愛,
這種感覺極期待!
用愛照亮我,
福杯滿滿盛載,
豐盛無更改!
原來神是愛!
太初開始己是存在。
全憑是愛,
護蔭一生使我空虛不再。
原來神是愛!
太初開始己是存在。
傳揚神是愛,
地老天荒不變不死的愛。
我仲有好多見證,希望將來有機會,再同大家分享。
承蒙主恩,願耶穌基督保守大家。
(將來在街上見到我,記住叫我Peter)
~完~

Monday, February 18, 2013

Forgiveness, Girl in Famous Vietnam photo

Girl in famous Vietnam photo talks about forgiveness

Now in her 50s, Kim Phuc lives in Toronto and has created an organization to promote peace. She will speak on Feb. 19 at a conference of educators at the Fenn School in Concord.
Now in her 50s, Kim Phuc lives in Toronto and has created an organization to promote peace. She will speak on Feb. 19 at a conference of educators at the Fenn School in Concord.

The girl in the photo — naked, crying, burned, running, with other children, away from the smoke — became emblematic of human suffering during the Vietnam War. Kim Phuc was 9 then, a child who would spend the next 14 months in the hospital and the rest of her life in skin blistered from the napalm that hit her body and burned off her clothes. She ran until she no longer could, and then she fainted.

More than 40 years after her injury, Phuc, now married with two teenagers and living near Toronto, travels the world to talk about the anger she left behind. After years spent in internal pain, she said, she forgave those who disfigured her.

“Through my story, I really give people hope,” she said by phone from her home in Canada. “If they [are] seeking hope and forgiveness, it’s possible. If that little girl can do it, then everyone can do it.”
Phuc, who created a foundation devoted to helping child victims of war, will speak at the Fenn School in Concord on Tuesday as part of the fourth annual Multicultural Educators Forum. (Some seats are available to the public, and can be reserved by e-mailing Jennifer Youk See at jyouksee@fenn.org.)

Phuc will address how schools can develop the qualities of empathy, respect and forgiveness. She was asked to take part in the forum after the independent school’s director of diversity and some faculty members heard her speak at a conference last year.
‘“If they [are] seeking hope and forgiveness, it’s possible. If that little girl can do it, then everyone can do it.’
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Phuc lived in Trang Bang, north of Saigon, when the war started. On June 8, 1972, Phuc, her family, other villagers and South Vietnamese soldiers had been hiding in a temple for three days. The day of the attack, they heard planes flying overhead. One of the soldiers told the civilians to run away, that the plane was going to bomb the temple.

Phuc went outside and saw the plane getting closer, and then heard the sound of four bombs hitting the ground. She couldn’t run. She didn’t know until later, but the bombs carried napalm, a gel-like incendiary that clings to its victims as it burns.

“Suddenly I saw the fire everywhere around me,” she remembers. “At that moment, I didn’t see anyone, just the fire. Suddenly, I saw my left arm burning. I used my right hand to try to take it off.”
Her left hand was damaged, too. Her clothes burned off. Later, she would be thankful that her feet weren’t damaged because she could run away, run until she was outside the fire. She saw her brothers, her cousins, and some soldiers running, too. She ran until she couldn’t run any more.
“I called out, ‘Too hot, too hot,’ ” she remembers. “Then one of the soldiers, he tried to help me. He poured water over my body. At that moment, I passed out.”

Kim Phuc (center) suffered burns from a napalm bombing in 1972 during the Vietnam War that left her disfigured. She had ripped off her burning clothes while fleeing.
AP/File
Kim Phuc (center) suffered burns from an aerial napalm bombing in 1972 during the Vietnam War that left her disfigured. She had ripped off her burning clothes while fleeing.

She learned afterward that the photographer, Huynh Cong “Nick” Ut, took her to the hospital. Two of her cousins, ages 9 months and 3 years, died in the bombing. Phuc had burns over two-thirds of her body and was not expected to live.

She spent 14 months at the hospital, undergoing many skin grafts and surgeries. But after she recovered, she was used by the Vietnamese government for propaganda: She was a “living symbol of the war.”

Phuc converted to Christianity 10 years after the attack, when she was living with her sister in Saigon. Phuc was reading about religion in the library, searching for meaning in her suffering, and was moved by the New Testament.

Her conversion displeased her family, she said, who practiced Cao Dai, a Vietnamese religion. She also grew tired of the government’s control over her life. In 1986, she went to study in Cuba, where she met her husband.

They traveled to Moscow for their honeymoon in 1992, and defected to Canada when their plane stopped in Newfoundland for fuel. Now they live with their two sons, Thomas, 18, and Stephen, 15, near Toronto. Phuc had feared that her injuries would keep her from experiencing both marriage and motherhood.

”After I left the hospital, every time I endured the pain and I look at my scars, I never thought in the future no boy [would] love me and marry me, so that I never have the normal life like everyone else,” she said.

Phuc’s scars on her back and arms still hurt, especially when the weather changes. She eats healthy foods, exercises, and tries to distract herself from the pain.

Now 49, Phuc serves as a goodwill ambassador for the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization, or UNESCO, and gives 20 or 25 speeches around the world each year.

“People helped me through — the doctor, nurses,” Phuc said. “People find the way to help me and they give me the future. And so now I really want to give back.”

The iconic photo earned Ut, who was working for the Associated Press, the Pulitzer Prize. Phuc keeps a copy in her house, hidden in a bookcase among magazines. She only looks at it when she is alone.

“It’s horrible, it’s ugly. I can feel the burning, the smell, at that moment,” she said. “I avoid that. It’s my choice. I avoid living that past.”


Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Letter to a (Real Life) Hurting Pastor

By Chris Surber

Chris Surber is the Pastor of Cypress Chapel Christian Church in Suffolk, VA. He is also a religion columnist for the Suffolk News Herald.


Of all the communication I receive in response to my writing ministry, among my favorites are those from fellow pastors. Even prior to entering full time ministry I was sympathetic to the unique challenges and pressures that pastors face. As one commentator put it, “People expect the clergy to have the grace of a swan, the friendliness of a sparrow, the strength of an eagle and the night hours of an owl—and some people expect such a bird to live on the food of a canary.”

I recently received the following email from a man who signed his email only as "Hurting Pastor." “I am a local pastor. I have been serving a church for 10 years faithfully. During these years, I have never had an appreciation service of any kind. I know it is biblical for the church to do this for their pastor in love. Is there ever a time when this should be preached? I have addressed this matter with my leadership team. Should I just teach on this matter from the pulpit? What do you think?”

What should a pastor do when he feels underappreciated? Sadly, this man’s story is not exceptional. It isn’t hard to find real-life accounts of hurting pastors. Many reports suggest that pastoral tenure is at an all-time low. Pastors stay shorter and look harder for bigger and better opportunities. This is often attributed to excessively ambitious clergy. That may be true in some cases.  However, is it not possible that in at least as many cases pastors are hurting more than church culture allows them to admit? Perhaps churches could use training on the unique challenges placed upon pastors and their families. Here is the core of what I wrote back to Rev. Hurting Pastor:

1. Pastor, your first and deepest "appreciation" comes from the Lord.

We really do have to learn to rest in Christ and find our value and purpose in being a child of God, not a servant of the Kingdom. There is a difference. It’s easy to think that being a pastor is what we are, but it’s not. It’s our vocation in the Kingdom. It’s what we do. We are foremost a child of God, just like everyone we serve.

2. Pastor, we all feel similar struggles to varying extents.

We have to learn to "get life" from multiple sources so we don't dry out. I write a weekly column in a newspaper, contribute to various ministry-related websites, and write books and tracts. I get life from these activities. They help me stay focused and refreshed in the sometimes arid times of pastoral life. While you may not consider yourself a writer, consider a blog—even blog as "hurting pastor" anonymously—and you might be surprised the impact you could have on other pastors wading through the often mucky waters of pastoral life.

3. Pastor, don't stop being who God created you to be. 

Invest in your interests outside of ministry. Like many pastors, I’m guilty of investing into precious few activities that are not directly related to my work in the local church. Do you have an interest in travel? Incorporate your pastoral life into a trip to visit a missionary your church supports. I’m presently planning just such a trip with my wife and tribe of kids going along.

4. Pastor, we are servants of the King and His Kingdom, but we are not without value ourselves.

Even a slave should have his needs met. Churches will unwittingly take as much life from a pastor as he is willing to give. People are needy, but we are people, too. Don't forget self-care. You and I are among colleagues who seldom seek health care or spiritual care for ourselves. It doesn’t honor God to focus so much on others that we let ourselves burn out.   

5. Pastor, teach on the subject of pastoral care, but be careful how you do it.

Early in ministry, a mentor advised me wisely to take care every sermon is a "we" thing, not a "you" thing. A sermon titled, "You chumps don't know how to care for a pastor to save your life” is probably not a good idea and won’t be effective. Whereas a series of sermons on the topic of community care in the Church, which includes teaching on pastoral care and concerns, may be effective. Educate them on this subject with some degree of subtlety for, as most pastors have discerned, it’s altogether too easy to look self-serving in the pastorate.

Highlight biblical passages where it is seems obvious that a person’s faith is connected to how they think about the church and its leaders. Look at the example in Acts 16 of the Philippian jailer: "At that hour of the night the jailer took them and washed their wounds; then immediately he and all his family were baptized." (Acts 16:33 NIV84)  After he received faith, he cared for the Lord's servants. Perhaps bring in a guest speaker to talk on this subject. It is not selfish to help the body of Christ understand that healthy pastors make for healthier churches. Pastoral health is good for the Kingdom and therefore it matters.

While the pastoral journey is a long and arduous pilgrimage, I wouldn't trade it for anything. Pastors do get a lot of blame they don’t deserve and little of the credit they do deserve. We need to care for ourselves, and the body needs to appreciate the work of their pastor.  However, at the end of the day, all of the glory belongs to the Lord. Pastor, sincerely, earnestly, cast your cares upon Him (Matthew 11:28-30).




Should You Start a Chapter of the Boring Preacher's Club?

A recent Wall Street Journal (July 19, 2012) article highlighted the Dull Men's Club of Pembroke, Mass.—a weekly gathering of older fellows which celebrates their mutual…well, dullness.

The story cited one member "who knows all the U.S. presidents' middle names and can recite the alphabet backward. Another member, Frank Tobin, might bring a picture of an antique car and award a $2 bill to whoever guesses the make and model. Attendees have discussed hummingbirds and studied park benches around the world. They debated raking leaves versus letting them lie.

"Believe it or not, we spent two and a half meetings on which way to put toilet paper on the roll, over or under," says another regular, Ken Girten, a 76-year-old retired banker. "It was pretty much tied."

In a culture obsessed with activity and extremes, it's not surprising that some turn—slowly, of course—to the more mundane. "We're all supposed to be busy, busy, busy, but what's wrong with being ordinary?" says Leland Carlson, a retired tax attorney in Chappell, Neb., who runs the national Dull Men's Club website—a loosely organized online community for "good citizens who are not setting the world on fire," and which inspired the Pembroke club. The club, which started in the 1990s, now has 5,000 members, up from 3,000 five years ago.

Which got me thinking about the church…Surely in the midst of booming megachurches with their crackling-good communicators, there must be a place left for the ordinary. Did I hear someone say "Boring Preacher's Club"?

The Boring Preacher's Club never would meet at Starbucks—too trendy. More likely, it would gather at Cracker Barrel. While the Dull Men's Club has a T-shirt with the slogan "Dull but Never Boring," I don't think the Dull Preacher's Club would want to spend money on shirts. Besides, a little bit of boring can build character.

Imagine the fun you could have at the weekly meeting of the Boring Preacher's Club:

• Reciting the list of the kings of Israel—backward

• Analyzing the various types of seeds grown in first century Israel as a way to liven up sermons on the Parable of the Sower

• Discussing the positive aspects of the elder brother in the Parable of the Prodigal Son

• Reviewing the pros and cons of the Dewey Decimal System vs. the Library of Congress indexing system for the pastor's library

•  Reminiscing about favorite church history lectures from seminary days

• Recalling the joys of old-fashioned typewriters

• Wondering whatever happened to the Jebusites

Let me know if you decide to start your own chapter of the Dull Preacher's Club. I might decide to join—when I find the time to be bored.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

怕老婆




某大公司的主管十分怕老婆,但很想知道是不是每個男人都一樣,

於是有一天集合公司內所有已婚男士;
「覺得自己怕老婆的人站到左邊,覺得自己不怕老婆的人站到右邊。」

之後只見一陣騷動,大部分人都去左邊,只有一個去右邊,還有兩個站在原地不動。

他首先問第一個站在原地不動的人:「為什麼你站著不動?」

答道:「我老婆交代過我,若公司中有分派系時,要保持中立,那一邊都不要參加,所以我站在中間。」

他再問第二個站在原地不! 動的人:「你又為什麼站著不動?」答道:「我老婆說凡事不可自己做決定,要先問她才算,

我可不可以先打個電話給她呀?」

這時眾人皆以敬佩的眼光投向獨自站到右邊的那位男士,並請他發表感言,他就說:「我老婆說人多的地方不要去。」
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哈哈哈!真好笑!這些人幹嘛那麼怕老婆啊!真受不了...............

But....我老婆說:「看到好笑的笑話要轉寄給大家!」

幸福的台階


幸福有時候只需要一個台階

那年,她剛剛25歲,鮮活水嫩的青春襯著,人如綻放在水中的白蓮花。唯一的不足是個子太矮,穿上高跟鞋也不過 一米 五多點兒,卻心高氣傲地非要嫁個條件好的。

是相親認識的他,180cm 的個頭,魁梧挺拔,劍眉朗目,她第一眼便喜歡上了。

隔著一張桌子坐著,卻低著頭不敢看他,兩隻手反覆撫弄衣角,心像揣了免子,左衝右撞,心跳如鼓。

2個人馬上看對眼就愛上了,日子如同蜜裡調油,恨不得24小時都黏在一起。

兩個人拉著手去逛街,樓下的大爺眼花,有一次見了他就問:「送孩子上學啊?」

他鎮定自若地應著,卻拉她一直跑出好遠,才憋不住笑出來。

他沒有大房子,她也心甘情願地嫁了他.....拍結婚照時,兩個人站在一起,她還不及他的肩膀。

她有些難為情,他笑,沒說她矮,卻自嘲是不是自己太高了?攝影師把他們帶到有台階的背景前,指著他說:「你往下站一個台階。」

他下了一個台階,她從後面環住他的腰,頭靠在他的肩上,附在他耳邊悄聲說:「你看,你下個台階我們的心就在同一個高度上了。」

結婚後的日子就像漲了潮的海水...各自繁忙的工作、沒完沒了的家務、孩子的奶瓶尿布、數不盡的瑣事,一浪接著一浪洶湧而來,讓人措手不及。

漸漸地便有了矛盾和爭吵,有了哭鬧和糾纏。

第一次吵架,她任性地摔門而去,走到外面才發現無處可去。只好又折回來,躲在樓梯口,聽著他慌慌張張地跑下來,聽聲音就能判斷出,他一次跳了2個台階。

最後一級台階,他踩空了,整個人撞在欄杆上,「哎喲哎喲」地叫。

她看著他的狼狽樣,終於沒忍住,捂嘴笑著從樓梯口跑出來。她伸手去拉他,卻被他用力一拽,跌進他的懷裡。

他捏捏她的鼻子說:「以後再吵架,記住也不要走遠,就躲在樓梯口,等我來找妳。」

她被他牽著手回家,心想,真好啊!連吵架都這麼有滋有味的。

2次吵架是在街上,為買一件什麼東西,一個堅持要買、一個堅持不要買,爭著爭著她就惱了,摔手就走。

走了幾步後躲進一家超市,從櫥窗裡觀察他的動靜。以為他會追過來,卻沒有。他在原地待了幾分鐘後,就若無其事地走了。她又氣又恨,懷著一腔怒火回家,推開門,他雙腿蹺在茶几上

看電視。看見她回來,仍然若無其事地招呼她:「回來了,等你一起吃飯呢。」

他攬著她的腰去餐廳,挨個揭開盤子上的蓋,一桌子的菜都是她喜歡吃的。

她一邊把紅燒雞翅咂得滿嘴流油,一邊憤怒地質問他:「為什麼不追我就自己回來了?」

他說:「你沒有帶家裡的鑰匙,我怕萬一你先回來了進不了門;又怕你回來餓,就先做了飯,我這可都下了兩個台階了,不知道能否跟大小姐站齊了?」

她撲哧就笑了,所有的不快全都煙消雲散。

這樣的吵鬧不斷地發生,終於有了最凶的一次。

他打牌一夜未歸,孩子又碰上發了高燒,給他打電話,關機。

她一個人帶孩子去了醫院,第二天早上他一進門,她窩了一肚子的火霹靂啪啦地就爆發了……

這一次是他離開了,他說吵來吵去,他累了,收拾了東西,自己搬到單位的宿舍裡去住,留下她一個人,面對著冰冷而狼藉的家,心涼如水。

想到以前每次吵架都是他百般勸慰,主動下台階跟她求和,現在,他終於厭倦了,愛情走到了盡頭,他再也不肯努力去找台階了。

那天晚上,她輾轉難眠,無聊中打開相冊,第一頁就是他們的結婚照。她的頭親密地靠在他的肩上,兩張笑臉像花一樣綻放著。從照片上看不出她比他矮那麼多,可是她知道,他們之間還隔著一個台階。

她拿著那張照片,忽然想到,每次吵架都是他主動下台階,而她卻從未主動去上一個台階。

為什麼呢?難道有他的包容,就可以放縱自己的任性嗎?

婚姻是兩個人的,總是他一個人在下台階,距離當然越來越遠,心也會越來越遠。

其實,她上一個台階,也可以和他一樣高的啊!

她終於撥了他的電話,只響了一聲,他便接了。原來,他一直都在等她去上這個台階。

幸福有時候只需要一個台階.....

無論是他下來、還是你上去,只要兩個人的心在同一個高度和諧地振動,那就是幸福。

台階,其實說白一點就是先低頭,而這點說的簡單,做起來卻會讓某些人猶如上刀山下火海一般艱難。

人之所以不願意低頭大都是為了面子問題或覺得先低頭的人就輸了對方一截,怕對方會「軟土深掘」日後被對方吃的死死的。

所以,若發生爭執時,另一伴願意先下個台階低頭時,要了解對方可是鼓起很大的勇氣,所以請不要因為情緒而說些風涼話來打擊對方,以免將原本能和諧落幕的爭執又增添更多的風雨。

另外,低頭的人未必就是錯的人,在愛情上和對方低頭是一種愛的表現,若與對方爭執時,對方願意低頭請靜下心來感受一下對方的愛,也請珍惜這份愛,如此才能恩愛長久。